Lois Lane Panel of the Day
~ Superman: Birthright #6
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It’s Lois’ birthday: And this is one of my favorite panels summing up Lois. It’s hard to pick the best line but “No good place to hide her body” is my favorite.
Lois Lane is 75 today, but the comic this panel’s from doesn’t run until next Friday.
Before she learns about his secret identity, Lois Lane thinks Clark Kent is a goddamn mess
She goes to his place to work on a joint article and it takes her like half an hour to find out that Clark lives in an absolutely nonfunctional house
She has to change a lightbulb but there are no stools, no sufficiently high chairs, no way of reaching the ceiling unless you find a way to climb the walls. “How the hell do you change your bulbs?” she asks. Clark mutters something about misplacing the footstool and helps her drag the table from the kitchen to the living room.
Lois watches Clark make lasagna and has to physically restrain him from pulling the tray out of the oven with his bare hands. “Are you out of your goddamn MIND?” she yells, scrambling to pull him away on time. “What are you DOING? WHERE ARE THE OVEN MITTS?” and Clark is just like “Right…..oven mitts…….. I think I lost them with the uh. footstool” both he and Lois pause for a moment to engage in a riveting game of Mentally Punch Clark
Lois runs into the bathroom to put on a disguise and yells out, “Where do you keep your razor?” There’s a gust of wind and Clark comes back with slightly windswept hair. “I got it!” he says with unwarranted triumph. “It’s right here. The razor I use.” Lois looks at it and it is CLEARLY recently purchased and never used and she’s just like. I don’t even care anymore
For weeks she just assumes Clark is missing some crucial
element in his home and starts stacking her own things all over the place. Lois thinking Clark has no clue how to take care of himself while Clark is Eternally Tormented and has to find ways to keep his identity a secret while living in close quarters, and the slow burn mutual pining roommates AU of my dreams begins
Things Lois Lane does not envy Wonder Woman:
- Her friendship with Superman. Lois knows that they’re close friends and nothing more, and that her own relationship with Clark is deep and pure.
- Her power and respect. Wonder Woman has earned that and more.
Things Lois Lane does…
I think it is as admisable as superman finding evidence of things with his x-ray vission.
Or Batman’s “advanced interrogation” techniques!
Headcanon
Things Lois Lane does not envy Wonder Woman:
- Her friendship with Superman. Lois knows that they’re close friends and nothing more, and that her own relationship with Clark is deep and pure.
- Her power and respect. Wonder Woman has earned that and more.
Things Lois Lane does envy Wonder Woman:
- That goddamn lasso
- Why do you even need a truth lasso Diana
- Think of all the stories she could get with that thing goddammit
I wonder if truth-lasso confessions are admissible evidence in court.
In Defense of Lois Lane
I read a lengthy piece by @godstaff this morning in which they share ‘truths about Lois Lane that nobody wants to hear.’ The thesis: Lois is a secondary character who is ‘brazen’ and ‘rude’, friendless, a ‘horrible human being’ and not worth writing about because she exists only to reflect Superman’s light.
I disagree with much of it, but there’s also a point to be made about how Lois has been portrayed during the last 40 years or so.
Maybe it’s the semantics that stuck in my craw. As I understand it, there are two Secondary Character sub-groups: Minor characters (people who populate the world but not essential to the plot) and Supporting characters — they are necessary to move the story forward because they have a direct role in the action. To me, Lois has always been the epitome of a supporting character, one that shores up everything that makes Kal Superman.
Plus, she had her own title from 1958 to 1974 and for a time in the 60s it was one of DC’s top three sellers. Not bad for a supporting character.
If the character were named Lewis Lane, would he be described as Brazen and Rude? Or Hard-Charging and Determined? Yes, Superman did end up saving her time and again, but she rarely planned her investigations so that he’d catch her before she hit the pavement. And, for what it’s worth, Supes spent as much time being rude to her.
I disagree with the idea that she had no friends outside of work, therefore is an unlikeable person. Lois and Lana Lang were the best of frenemies and even teamed up in one story to report on the barbarity of the death penalty.
In the 1970s, Lois got some roommates —Kristin, Marsha and Julie. They were clearly pals and Julie in particular got into some scrapes with Lois including a couple of the infamous ‘bondage’ covers!
At one point, the essay refers to Lois as a ‘horrible human being’ because she’s basically selfish. I beg to differ. In the 1970s, Lois took on social issues like poverty, racism, drug abuse, Native American affairs and women’s liberation. Granted, some of those attempts were wince-inducing. But they were always driven by the experiences of other people around her.
I dropped off the Lois bandwagon in the mid-70s because I found the stories featuring her in Superman Family pretty dull. She was a dogged reporter doing reporter things but without the interaction with Superman it just fell flat for me.
My theory is that the mostly male editorial staff thought there’s no reason to portray a character like Lois once those pesky social issues were solved. Women didn’t have to get married to have economic security (the 50s and 60s Lois), women had careers and participated in the political/social milieu (70s Lois). Without second-wave feminism to kick around, the boys at DC didn’t know what the heck to do with the character.
@godstaff takes issue with the various super-incarnations of Lois and I agree. From what little I’ve read in today’s comics and seen on the CW TV shows, humans are not a vital part of any story. Aliens and meta-humans are all the rage and their interactions with homo sapiens is limited as the stories grapple with technology and other metaphorical, unwieldy world-ending horrors.
From my perspective, it’s the superhero characters who have grown stale, not the humans. Lois was one of the best characters precisely because she was a supporting player — it was a feature, not a bug. Again, I don’t read today’s comics, but perhaps Lois will always be a touchstone of the past. Even so, to this reader, she was a glorious incarnation of the smart, funny, silly, sometimes ridiculous but always entertaining world of comics. Maybe someday, the comic world will have a place for the always human Lois Lane.
What kind of asshole doesn’t like Lois Lane
^
Also it’s pretty weird that Dave Willis just cast me as Superman and himself as Lois Lane in this fanfic he’s writing in my ask box.
Just be thankful I’m not your Lucy Lane.
You are in real life, though.
I keep trying to tell you, man, you’re not ACTUALLY Superman’s Pal. He’s a fictional character. And what a silly looking mohawk! Some idiot with no taste must have cut your hair!
And frankly, I prefer to go to In-N-Out with MEN. You’re just too young for me, Sims.
‘scuse me while i deal with this kangaroo attack
![comicsalliance:
“ Link Ink:
Toys: A new Man of Steel Lego set sees Superman and Lois Lane face General Zod in a “Black Zero Escape” scenario. [The Brick Fan]
”
woooo sweatervest lois
just a few bricks away from LEGO joyce](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a2a3b50f2e74f3cf5bc6a57965e7337c/tumblr_mlgp8chA7M1qcw9rdo1_1280.png)
Toys: A new Man of Steel Lego set sees Superman and Lois Lane face General Zod in a “Black Zero Escape” scenario. [The Brick Fan]
woooo sweatervest lois
just a few bricks away from LEGO joyce
aijoskobi